Father's Day

I don't remember a time when this day of celebration has been particularly wonderful, as the loss of my dad actually happened when we were quite young (my mom and dad divorced when we were ages four and six). What happened next was that over the years we grew to love and accept the man my dad was, but not really in the role of parent. He was biologically our dad (and we have inherited many of his traits), but as a father-figure, just did not fill that space. I didn't realize until much later on how much of a void that left me with, and I'm sure you out there who didn't have a present father know what I mean. It does something to that self-esteem - if you let it, those dark, deep spaces of yourself will tell you that your own parent looked at you, saw what you had to offer, and willingly chose to take another path that would lead them away from you. I just look at Hudson, and think - how can a parent possibly make that decision? But I know how many other factors were involved in my own situation, so I choose to allow myself to be disappointed (which I do not readily allow myself to be) in what I did not have - but not bitter. For there is redemption for everything.
Tyler has a wonderful father.  He sings silly songs for his grandkids and gives endless pony rides to whichever little girl gets to him first. He will drop whatever he is doing to give you a hand, and is happy to do it. He is consistent, patient, gentle, giving and loving.

Ty is also a wonderful father. He had a swaddle song and a diaper song all ready to go before Hudson was even born (oh the silly songs - my dad was also all about the silly songs, so you can bet our kids will get their share). He gives Hudson his nightly cereal and bath (and actually takes his shirt off so Hudson can get in maximum splashing), comes up with all kinds of nick names (Studser is the latest), and picks out his clothes on Sunday mornings. But more than that, I know without a doubt that he will be involved and present in our children's lives for life long. That's where the redemption comes in. There' s alot to say about dads who show up to ballet recitals and soccer games and choir concerts, and whether or not they run up and down the sidelines or simply give a "well done" handshake, simply them being there is what is key.

So thankyou to dads who have done, and do, all of the above. Thankyou for guiding, directing, and unconditionally loving. You are helping to shape young lives, who will go on to do the same, and they will be forever changed because of it.